Braving Vulnerability

Vulnerability, it's the epitome of an authentic beloved relationship. Dr. Brené Brown says this great quote in her book Daring Greatly. She says, “Vulnerability sounds like truth and feels like courage. Truth and courage aren't always comfortable, but they're never weakness.” Recently, I've been thinking a lot about this and what it means to share our most intimate stories. Stories of sadness, pain, trauma, guilt, and shame. These are difficult stories to share. Why is it so easy to tell someone about something joyful and successful rather than a sorrow or failure? I'm not saying it doesn't happen. But I do think that in this society it happens less. We judge and assume before knowing the whole story.

The only times where I have seen courageous people being vulnerable with one another is when there has been an intention set in place. Why do we have to say that we're not going to judge you for what you tell us? Can't this be something that is the norm and not the exception?

I don't really have any answers or solutions. I'm just writing, or typing ;)  what I'm thinking.

What do you do if trust has been broken? Or you've been hurt? Does that take away the chance for vulnerability? Or do mitigating circumstances have merit?

Connections or relationships are how we survive. Or at least the majority of the population. How do you make the right ones? Finding the people that lift you up not put you down. People who listen with an open heart rather than dismiss. Obviously there's no algorithm for this, which is a drag. But maybe there are certain qualities that people portray or don't that indicate if they would be a positive rather than a negative influence. Or maybe it's a gamble either way and you have no way of knowing who someone is. And maybe they start out positive and then become negative or vice versa.

I'll end with another quote from Brené. Who says, "Our willingness to own and engage with our vulnerability determines the depth of our courage and the clarity of our purpose; the level to which we protect ourselves from being vulnerable is a measure of our fear and disconnection.”